“Thanks for calling BelBrite Technical Support. This is Kevin. Can I have your name?” A deep voice says, breaking through a stream of hold music.
I stare at a string of work emails on my phone, reading angry subject lines from higher-ups.
“Hi,” I say while reading.
“I apologize for the wait.”
“It’s fine. It gave me a chance to read some work emails.”
“Sounds like fun.”
“You have no idea.”
“Who do I have the pleasure of speaking with?”
I stumble with my answer, despite just reading it in messages that position me as the target of heat, if not fire, I say my name, and it comes out hoarse.
“Nice to meet you. What can I do for you?”
“My internet’s down. I keep resetting the router, but no luck.”
“Ok, well, let’s get it back up so you can answer those emails.”
“I can do that painful task on my phone. But, yes, please.”
“You got it. Going to run a test on my end,” Kevin says.
I hear his keyboard rattle a world away. Another email appears, this one from Claire.
I read, “Lori, you know me. I wouldn’t make a mistake this big. Speak to him tomorrow. See what he has to say for himself.”
“That snake,” I say aloud.
“What’s that?” Kevin says.
“Sorry, reading another email. It’s a bad day.”
“Sorry to hear that. It’s amazing how emails can cause a ton of trouble.”
“More like who sent them.”
“Right,” Kevin says, chuckling. “Well, that’s to be expected from a snake. Terrible coworkers. Hiss all day long.”
I laugh for the first time all day.
“This snake is my boss’ best friend. Cut-throat if there ever was one. Already got two others fired, and I’m next.”
“Oh, so we’re talking about a cobra, not a garter snake.”
“For sure. The kicker is I didn’t do what she says I did. I was just close enough to the situation that it’s plausible.”
“Can you prove it?” Kevin asks.
I stammer, surprised that he’s actually continuing the conversation, not just agreeing and moving on.
“I have all of it on paper. But the others did too. She has convinced my boss that we’re all expendable.”
“Sounds like an awful place to work, man.”
I stop for a second and think about who is on the other end of the phone. A stranger with no obligation to defend me, unlike my family or friends. Somehow, it helps me see clearly.
“Now that I think about it, they’re pretty much all snakes.”
“Sending your router a signal ping. So, has it always been like that there? At your work, I mean,” Kevin says.
“Kind of, yeah,” I say. “It’s been pretty, how to describe it,”
“Toxic?”
“That nails it. And now I’m going to be fired as the coup-de-gras.”
“I’ve been fired once too, man. Guess what? It wasn’t bad. Sure it stung, but after it was over, I realized that old place sucked. And then I found BelBrite. Pretty decent, if I do say so.”
“I just can’t stand the idea of actually being fired.”
“Think of it this way. Do you want to stay in a toxic snake pit or leave, even if it’s before you’re ready?”
At that moment, all lights flashed green on my router.
“You’re a damn good technician, Kevin.”
“I try, man. I try,” he says.
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MJ can be found on Twitter: https://twitter.com/MJWeisen